"Silly" customer questions [Archive]

Tifftastic

09-21-2008, 11:05 PM

I work at a pet store and I get some ridiculous questions some times. I was always told there was no such thing as stupid question, so I will just call them funny questions. Anyway, these are my top five favorites.

5. Do you have any allergy eaters?
4. What type of fish can go with chinchillas?
3. I have a sucker fish, do I really need a filter?
2. I have some red fish and some yellow fish, what kind of fish go good with them?
1. Wow, do fish really grow?

Anyway, these are the questions that always make me laugh and yes they are all real. I just wanted to share some laughs with everyone. Not to be mean to people who are just . . . well not informed enough about our fishy friends.

abi88

09-21-2008, 11:28 PM

How about when you are cleaning out tanks and a lady(for me it was at least) says...."ew! I dont want to have to do that! I'll just get a few big sucker fish and some big cat fish for my bowl!"

Eupterus

09-21-2008, 11:40 PM

Ummmmmm.....:rofl::rofl:.

J double R

09-21-2008, 11:51 PM

ROFLMAO!!!

and yes.. i know i'm awful. glad it didnt change anything. :lipssealedsmilie:

Rallysman

09-21-2008, 11:54 PM

No such thing as a stupid question. Just stupid people.

Tifftastic

09-21-2008, 11:57 PM

Oh man I just remembered the best one ever! I was talking to a customer about cycling her tank and why her water was cloudy and ammonia and etc. and she says this to me "So you are telling me that my water being cloudy is going to give my fish pneumonia and kill them?"

Frnchjeep

09-22-2008, 12:00 AM

These threads always remind me why I will never have the patience to work at a fish store.

Tifftastic

09-22-2008, 12:02 AM

These threads always remind me why I will never have the patience to work at a fish store.

Its much easier if you remember to laugh. That's what gets me through my shifts, haha.

Frnchjeep

09-22-2008, 12:05 AM

Its much easier if you remember to laugh. That's what gets me through my shifts, haha.
Haha, I guess. Sometimes, it is all you can do!

abi88

09-22-2008, 12:31 AM

Its much easier if you remember to laugh. That's what gets me through my shifts, haha.

that is VERY true! I have found though that that is the only true way that you get through any day when working with people! a little of this: :lipssealedsmilie: a little of this::wall: and a lot of this:eek3::omg::laugh: lol

DAVIDFBT

09-22-2008, 12:41 AM

I wonder what kind of funny questions I'll get thrown at me when I start working at a LFS in march. Although I did have this conversation with the guy who runs a pool place where I was buying some pool filter sand:

Me: Excuse me, where is the pool filter sand?
Guy: What size is the filter?
Me: Actually, I'm using it for an aquarium.
Guy: Is it a Fresh or Salt water aquarium?
Me: Fresh.
Guy: Nope, it won't work.
Me: Why not? I'm already using sand in my other tank.
Guy: Take it out then, your fish will choke on it if they try to grab food from the bottom.
Me: But the poo stays on top making it easier to clean.
Guy: It doesn't matter, it's bad for them.
Me: Look, do you want my money or not? I don't care what you say about my tank, just let me have the **** sand and let me leave.

Lupin

09-22-2008, 12:43 AM

No such thing as a stupid question. Just stupid people.
:iagree: :werd:

On second thought, there are a few exceptions for stupid questions based on my perception.:D

Slappy*McFish

09-22-2008, 6:26 PM

Guy: Nope, it won't work.
Me: Why not? I'm already using sand in my other tank.
Guy: Take it out then, your fish will choke on it if they try to grab food from the bottom.

lol..seems that a fish would be much more likely to choke on a piece of gravel than a few tiny grains of sand.

cam191919

09-22-2008, 6:33 PM

lol..seems that a fish would be much more likely to choke on a piece of gravel than a few tiny grains of sand.

the guy probably tried to keep fish in his pool filter, and they choked on dead spiders.

how was the chinchilla question not at least a two

DominionDesign

09-22-2008, 6:42 PM

My favorite when I had my shop was about the 180 marine angel tank in our front counter. I got this on more than one occasion, "what kind of fish is that?" Its a French Angel. "Is it fresh or salt?" Its salt. "What kind is that?"(pointing to same tank) Its a Green Bird Wrasse. "Is it fresh or salt?" After the third time this happened I stopped telling people that there is no such thing as a stupid question.

excuzzzeme

09-22-2008, 6:44 PM

2. I have some red fish and some yellow fish, what kind of fish go good with them?
1. Wow, do fish really grow?

#2 Fried fish or plastic ones will do well

#1 Like you, their bodies grow while their brains stay small

:grinyes::grinyes::grinyes:

crimsonmoon

09-22-2008, 6:54 PM

lol! this thread is so funny. I used to work at my local rip off mart....never doing that again lol

DAVIDFBT

09-22-2008, 7:07 PM

I remember someone saying Chinese allergy eaters here on AC. :grinyes:

J double R

09-22-2008, 7:12 PM

it was you wasnt it

DarkDH

09-22-2008, 7:54 PM

I was at my LFS that I may work at, and I could tell the employee was getting annoyed.

Customer: Mommy! I want that snail!
Mom: Okay honey, lets ask the nice lady for it then.

*proceeds to employee*

Employee: How many I help you?
Customer: I wanna snail!
Employee: Okay, what tank are you going to put it.....*cut off*
Customer: It doesn't matter! They mold to my tank, and I want him to play with my sucker fish!

Mother: We'll take two.

Employee: Are you sure? What size tank do you.... *cut off again*
Customer: They are in a huuuge tank *Spreads arms roughly the size of a 10 gallon*
Employee: *sighs, picks up snail*

"Have a nice day..."

As Customer and Mother walk out, customer is babbling about giving his gold fish, pleco (Suckerfish?!) crayfish, and guppies a new friend.

toodleypops

09-22-2008, 9:52 PM

my favorite and least favorite is when people walk in and they browse around then come over and get me to bag them some fish so i ask

ME: What can i get for you
Them: We'll take two of these, three of these, ummm a couple of those and maybe 1 of this and this and this... :D
ME: ...? What size tank do you have?
Them: oh we just got a new 5 gallon yesterday :D
ME: Just yesterday?? you really should wait at least a week before you get fish (explain nitro cycle) and then you can have like around 5 of these fish over here (to small community section)
Them: But the picture on the box shows a lot of fish!

:headshake2::wall::duh:

Amante_di_Betta

09-23-2008, 12:27 AM

My favorite is when they walk up to you and ask if you work there..

Tifftastic

09-23-2008, 1:04 AM

how was the chinchilla question not at least a two

If I didnt get the chinchilla question as often I guess it would be funnier to me, but it happens like once a week. Its still pretty good though.

DAVIDFBT

09-23-2008, 1:26 AM

My favorite is when they walk up to you and ask if you work there..

I've had that happen to me at least once every time I go there. I go to my LFS so much, the employees and owners know me by name. Just 6 more months until I can work there...

Although, this has happened to me:

I was looking at the rummynose tetra tank that is next to the Ram tank.

Customer: No, not that one, that one.
Employee: Which one?
Customer: I don't know the difference between them.

I politely butted in and since the employee knows me, I asked "What is the problem?

Employee: This man wants 4 Bolivian rams except that we have GBRs in there too and I don't know which one is which.
Me: Well, the Bolivian ram is the one that looks tanner than the other one and has a pinkish body while a german ram is gold with blue accents. And if you get them in when they're old enough, the males will have a long fin ray at the front of his dorsal fin while a female's will be even all through the fin.
Customer: Thanks buddy.
Employee: You should really work here, I'll recommend you to the owner if you ever decide to work here.

On the ride home, I was happy as a clam. :)

Arakkis

09-23-2008, 4:40 AM

Someone asked me where the "dandy-ohs" were
I said they're where the "preggos and "chicklets" are

I know I'm mean.

Though they then asked me if they carry dolphins... That was another story...

wataugachicken

09-23-2008, 12:26 PM

i don't get the chinchilla thing. . . .

toodleypops

09-23-2008, 11:52 PM

they are trying to say cichlid... chick-lid, chee-chlid, kick-lid, chin-chick-lid, chinchilla, we get them all hahaha

toodleypops

09-23-2008, 11:57 PM

yeah so earlier today some1 came and asked me what would go with their "red fish". after about 5 minutes of quizzing them i finally deduced that it was (or was similar to) a Red Zebra. she wanted to put guppies with it... so i told her thats not smart (her cichlid was about 6" she said) so she asked what she could put with them. I felt bad because i dont know too much about rift lake cichlids (or any African for that matter) and said if she had come in like 2-4" ago i would be more useful. i felt kinda bad...

but i guess the funny part is she had a 6 inch red fish in a 14g tank. which i kindly suggested upgrading.... very very soon.

lilim10

09-24-2008, 12:11 AM

Crazy things happen at lfs, I remember a girl and her parents looking at the bettas:

Parents: Do you want another betta honey?
Girl: No, I already have two.
Younger brother: But mine died...can I have another one?
Girl: Well, you're not putting him with mine! But hey look! There's a girl betta! Mommy, can we get her? I bet the boy will be happy to have her with him!

I sincerely hope that she was not keeping them in the same tank...

toodleypops

09-24-2008, 12:14 AM

hahaha male Bettas are such pimps what are you talking about. Get the Girl, seduce the girl, kill the girl, no sweat. :D hahaha

abi88

09-25-2008, 12:44 AM

My favorite is when they walk up to you and ask if you work there..

lol..ya its like---"Oh, NO ma'am....I just like standing around in khaki pants and this Horridly ugly polo shirt!"

hahaha male Bettas are such pimps what are you talking about. Get the Girl, seduce the girl, kill the girl, no sweat. :D hahaha

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Yes Jake that is QUITE true!!

Ah those HORRID Betta males (or is it just Bettas.........hmmmmmmm????)LOL

abi88

10-05-2008, 11:19 PM

wow! nothing more from anyone else???

:O AMAZING!!!!

toodleypops

10-28-2008, 10:50 PM

bump for kicks!
here read through this one on MFK..
very funny
http://www.monsterfishkeepers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=182448&page=7

DarkCrow

10-29-2008, 12:31 AM

People mistake me for working at my local LFS because the normal employees are pretty rude and dislike anyone who doesn't own a large saltwater tank under their service (go figure).

Anyways, the other day a guy asked me in the shop if an oscar could be fed ridiculous stuff like other fish (including fancy goldfish and gouramis).

Tifftastic

10-29-2008, 12:56 AM

A customer yesterday asked me why I didn't feed feeder guppies to the gouramis "cuz they are related to piranha you know?"

Ugh.

DarkCrow

10-29-2008, 5:12 AM

A customer yesterday asked me why I didn't feed feeder guppies to the gouramis "cuz they are related to piranha you know?"

Ugh.
How strange, I got slightly the same thing yesterday...

UncaBret

10-29-2008, 10:44 AM

I would have high school kids come into the hobby store I managed and ask me, "Do you know what time it is?".

I would turn around and look at the clock on the wall, then turn back to them and say, "I do now".

toodleypops

10-30-2008, 4:07 PM

my favorite is when people ask where the bathroom is... and i know its just i work there and they might not come in the often, but from my podium you can see the big blue restroom sign, so i usually just look and point hoping they will see it

DarkCrow

10-31-2008, 6:43 AM

I own a moving company and get several dumb questions.

My top 3:

-Can you put my car in the back of a moving truck?
-Do you charge extra for Sunday? (might not be that funny to any of you, but it's downright hilarious to me)
-Can my *insert young child age* ride in the back of the packed truck to *insert far away destination*?

Tifftastic

11-05-2008, 2:06 AM

crimsonmoon

11-05-2008, 3:06 AM

oh my. thats extra special...

Lupin

11-05-2008, 4:04 AM

abi88

11-05-2008, 1:34 PM

I've decided that I love this one

"If I got a pool and filled it with these fish (points to the pacu) and I threw a body in there, would they eat it bones and all?"

It may be surprising but I get this question a lot more than most would think.

LOL!! yes I remember getting that one....and then of course the one by the collage/high schoolers that would ask if they got a tank full of Oscars and if they were having a party and a friend stuck their arm in the tank if they would no longer have an arm!! :jaw-dropping::shakehead::cry::rofl::argue::wall:

Tifftastic

11-05-2008, 4:11 PM

LOL!! yes I remember getting that one....and then of course the one by the collage/high schoolers that would ask if they got a tank full of Oscars and if they were having a party and a friend stuck their arm in the tank if they would no longer have an arm!! :jaw-dropping::shakehead::cry::rofl::argue::wall:

Ah college kids sometimes we don't know what to do with ourselves besides ask stupid questions. . .

"Hey do you have any Nemo fish?"

"No ma'am we only carry freshwater"

"Exactly, so where are your Nemo fish? I want to put one in a bowl in a dorm room"

" . . . ."

[Luckily I have never been that bad]

SchizotypalVamp

11-05-2008, 4:23 PM

Tombs of unknown nemos....

The Zigman

11-05-2008, 4:25 PM

As I sat on a 32,000# forklift inthe lumberyard, someone actually asked me...

"hey do you work here?"

To which I said Nope.. and drove away.

you cant fake stupidity...

krazy4country

11-05-2008, 6:32 PM

lol

caitylee

11-05-2008, 7:15 PM

Man some people just amaze me, well I guess not because it takes all kinds right haha

cam191919

11-05-2008, 7:20 PM

ha, peoples is dumb

Tifftastic

11-06-2008, 2:10 AM

abi88

11-06-2008, 11:22 AM

Yes peoples is dumb. But it gets me through my work day laughing at them. Like the guy today who said he had a gecko "about this big" [stretches arms to about 3 feet]. . .

Needless to say I was very confuzzled.

LOL!! I some how think that that was a wee bit of an exaggeration!....or maybe be had the one mutant gecko!!lol

Oh I was at the local little pet store and a guy wanted "Those water spiders that were in with the crabs....not the crabs that had the hands" When I looked at the tank they were all crabs just some of the poor little guys didnt have their claws! Ah the stupidity of people!

caitylee

11-06-2008, 1:58 PM

He was talking about an iguana?

Tifftastic

11-07-2008, 3:09 PM

After my coworker pointed him toward the reptile books, he determined it was a green water dragon. But he "swore it was a gecko, like the one on those commercials."

It was pretty funny though.

FISHSHROD

11-07-2008, 4:33 PM

krazy4country

11-07-2008, 4:37 PM

lol

FISHSHROD

11-07-2008, 4:38 PM

that's what I do LOL

powerkit

11-07-2008, 5:18 PM

my fav was in fast food, when folks come thru the drive thru and say theyd like thier order to go.
I work in Human Resources now and the abundance of stupidity///thank GOD for excederine!!!!

The Zigman

11-07-2008, 5:34 PM

ya just cant fake stupid...

FISHSHROD

11-07-2008, 5:34 PM

OMG !!!!!!!!! that's a good one

FISHSHROD

11-07-2008, 5:40 PM

Maybe off topic but funny :)

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justahannah

11-07-2008, 6:02 PM

Then there are the customers that want to know more about bettas.."What would happen if I put them together?" "Why are the females ugly?" "These fish eat bamboo, right?" "My betta doesn't move except to eat, he just sits on the bottom all the time, why is that?" and after some questioning "Well, I keep him in a fish bowl about this (hands indicating something roughly softball sized) big..." and my least favorite, while I was doing their water changes, "Hey, if I pay you $20, will you dump a couple of those guys in the same cup for me?"

UncaBret

11-08-2008, 11:14 AM

Some peoples kids....

justahannah

11-08-2008, 6:59 PM

...mine were all asked by adults.

Tifftastic

11-09-2008, 11:38 PM

Oh ya its always the adults that ask. I find it funny when the kids answer the questions for the parents.
Example [this actually happened once]

Parent [to me]: So why do I have to do water changes?
Kid [to parent]: Mom, the fish pee in the water thats gross.

Lady G

11-10-2008, 1:07 AM

Well, not a lfs I work at..but I'd have to say my fav questions so far would have to be...

We have to wear name tags where I work (drives me nuts) anyway I actually have had several ppl ask me "Is that really your name"..to which I usually answer "No, I made it up" some ppl actually have looked at me like they thought I was serious..most realize how "silly" the question was and laugh though.

Then we make our own rootbeer there, it is on tap. After telling them we had "homemade" rootbeer they asked what kind it was..to which I answered "well, we make our own" and they said so is it "A & W"..I was like "Ummm, no I don't think we have their recipe"

FISHSHROD

11-10-2008, 8:03 AM

HERE'S THEIR SIGN :werd:

abi88

11-10-2008, 12:55 PM

HERE'S THEIR SIGN :werd:

Haha...I was thinking more like this one! http://www.fishaholics.org/images/smilies/dumbass.gif or http://www.fishaholics.org/images/smilies/merror.gif or http://www.fishaholics.org/images/smilies/banme.gif

caitylee

11-10-2008, 1:44 PM

I answer the phone at work with our company name and time after time I have people say " Hello, is this (insert company name here) ?
I'm like , HELLO , WHAT DID YOU JUST HEAR WHEN I ANSWERED THE PHONE ?????? (I don't say it to the customer but feel like it )
I did not say HELLO !!!!!!!!! I answered with our company name :werd:

Example :
RING A LING :
ME : Joes Plumbing !!!
Customer : Yes , is this Joes Plumbing ????
Me ::confused:

This happens to me as well.

I answer with the company name and then I have people start rattling off their bank account numbers. Our number is 1 off of the banks. I feel like telling them "Tell me that one more time and let me get a pen" But usually I say "Hold on, Hold on, we are not the bank" before they finish the number.

Tifftastic

11-17-2008, 1:22 AM

Time for a new silly question.

A customer came to me today to ask about the Flukers orange cricket cubes. I was expecting the normal question about "How does it work, do I still have to dust Calcium, etc" but this lady has something totally new!!!!

"Is there anything toxic in this?"
Me: Its meant to feed to the crickets, so I'm guessing not.
"No not toxic to the crickets, if my bearded dragon eats the cricket after the cricket eats this, will my bearded dragon get sick and die?"
Me: Its safe to feed to the crickets as a gut load, so everything in there is safe for reptiles.
"Well the jar doesnt say its safe for bearded dragons, just says its for crickets and is for gut loading."
Me: Ma'am I am sure that your beardie will be fine. Its basically made out of a lot of the same stuff as beardie pellets are.

Then she just walked off giving me a strange look . . .

abi88

11-17-2008, 1:32 AM

OMG! Tiff that is VERY "Silly" hmmmm....I wonder if she ever thinks about what the animals she eats are eating!!

Virtuoso2K12

11-17-2008, 1:34 AM

i heared this before from a customer and a employee
Customer(Bob): Do this zebra danios really glo?
Employee(Sally):Idk,they should(looking at a paper about Glo Fish)
Bob:Cool,i'll take one
Sally:How big is your tank?
Bob: Don't have one yet,can a 1g be enough?how many more can i add?
Sally:No,just that.
Come one,they don't sell Glo fish in Cailfornia.People now a days.

Tifftastic

11-17-2008, 1:47 AM

I wonder if she ever thinks about what the animals she eats are eating!!

Ah dont make me think about it!!!

Virtuoso2K12

11-17-2008, 1:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by abi88 http://www.aquariacentral.com/forums/ms_icons/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://www.aquariacentral.com/forums/showthread.php?p=1708024#post1708024)
I wonder if she ever thinks about what the animals she eats are eating!!
What's wrong tiff?

Tifftastic

11-17-2008, 2:00 AM

Oh man they put too many hormones and nasties in animal food! I try to go veggie whenever I can!

Except sushi . . . ah my kryptonite!

abi88

11-17-2008, 5:33 PM

LOL...sorry about that Tif!...But you know me...it is also about the Vegi and Fruits and TOTALLY about Sushi when it can be:)....I was actually thinking the same thing!LOL

Tifftastic

11-18-2008, 2:06 AM

Today a customer asked me if the Red Bellied PIKA (WTF) were anything like piranha. Not an unusual question (I hear it almost everyday), but he was reading right off the tag and continued to call them pika about three or for more times . . . I dont think I mis-heard him either he was saying it like Peek-a . . . Just weirded me out a bit so I had to share.

Lupin

11-18-2008, 2:08 AM

toodleypops

11-18-2008, 3:29 PM

SO are these the Freshwater Goldfish?
Last time i got some they were Saltwater goldfish..

Tifftastic

11-19-2008, 1:10 AM

SO are these the Freshwater Goldfish?
Last time i got some they were Saltwater goldfish..

Oh my! Are you serious??? I can't believe someone asked you that??? Thats better than the customers who ask why Nemo is salt water!

abi88

11-19-2008, 2:14 PM

SO are these the Freshwater Goldfish?
Last time i got some they were Saltwater goldfish..

WOW!!! that is quite the question!! haha....Im still laughing over that one!

abi88

01-12-2009, 1:35 AM

Ok.....here is one for ya....Some one came into Sub-way and asked my friend "How much is the five dollar foot long?"!! I think she should have tacked on a couple dollars just cause of having to answer that question...but ya know!lol

Dwarf Puffers

01-12-2009, 2:58 PM

LOL...

FISHSHROD

01-12-2009, 7:40 PM

Hairechest

01-13-2009, 10:26 AM

Ah... Retail.

I roast coffee and people ask me if my micro roaster with lighted glass chamber is a grinder. I sigh...

People ask me if all of my coffee is locally grown.... sigh.

Often they ask for whatever is directly in front of them, and when I tell them it is, they look to either side of center... when I point to it, they pick up the item next to it. When I say it's in the top left, they look center right. I think that asking for help, automatically makes your brain stop working. Reason does not work with idiots.

When asked "can you help me", I refrain from saying "there isn't any for you".

When people ask me where the coffee department is, I feel like slitting my wrists.

People walk up to me, surrounded by bins of coffee beans, and ask me for a cup of coffee... I direct them to the coffee bar (which says coffee and tea served here).

When someone tells me they want to try something different. I ask for a list of everything they have tried up to this point.

When people want a pound of coffe I give it to them, they then want a half pound. Is this because a pound sounds good but they have no clue as to what it actually is?

When asked why "bag it yourself" bulk coffee is cheaper than the coffee already bagged, I reply - they have to pay someone to put it in the bags.

PuppyFluffer

01-15-2009, 5:02 AM

Not a stupid thing but a funny one.

My cell phone number is close to the phone number for the jail in a nearby community. I get calls for the jail occasionally.

I got one the other day.
Man says: "uh, is this the XYZ jail" when i answer hello.
I say: "No, I get these calls frequently. You have misdialed. You called 8300. The jail is 3800"
My kids were playing and gleefully squealing in the background
Man said: "I thought the inmates sounded a little young."
LOL