need to vent

[livebearerfreak]

well it all started yesterday at a store they sell fish i went and told my aunt ima get some feeders ( i know a big NO for feeders but still my oscar wanted some ) but they didnt have any feders so instead i went and baught 2 new fish ( im upgradeing dont worry plz and no comments bout this either plz ) fish to be unnamed cause i was rescueing them. well i thought i could fool my aunt and saying there feeders well now im grounded for 2 weeks from the internet and from goin outside. ( i now a 19 year old being grounded is retarded ) if she cought be on the internet at home or school she said she will take my computer down and i wont have it ( HAH thats my comppter not hers ) then i got p*ssed at my sister and told my aunt that she is shareing her cigs with our cousin ( my aunts kids ) there 14 and 15 now she says im the worst brother she had ( i dont even now how to be a brother for crying out loud i havent seen her in 11 years and shes gunna be 18 on dec 15th or 16th i think ) so i just got into it with her and my aunt last nite my sis is blaming my aunt crying on me and my aunt said its all our fault for lieing to her and all she does is wake up every day and make sure we have the stuff we need each day and all she gets is lies behind her back.. so now my sister sstill gets to go on my compter and i dont even tho she lets our cousin smoke her cigs.... now lets get to today.dec 1st. i got into a fight again with my aunt bout the money sitiution and now she threatening me that her and grandma are gunna throw me into assisted living/independent living, cause she says shes tired of me makin hjer p*ssy everyday ( o and before school and the arugue ments i was trying to make a wet/dry system for my 10 gallon and its not completeed yet byt i and my cousin is gunaa finish it tonite maybe ) anyways back on topic, she said im not gunna make her have to go to the hospital from me stressing her out so i told her im not goin to assisted living/independent living i will go to my friends grandmas house and she said "do wt u wanna but i and grandma can put u into a home and u have no say in it"
a Q, do i have a say in it? even tho im 19?
anyways back on topic.
i yelled at her cause she wont give me my allowense from the ssi i get each month. she said she wont let me spend it on unnessisary stuff and fish/fish item is not a needed stuff. "HAH im 19 i can handle my own money" i told her and now she said shes gunna go to the ssi building so i can go threw them each month to get money and fight with them. she also told me that this money is NOT mine its for me to pay my bills and all.

ok need to rest my arms and hope i dont get caught at school goin on MFK cause my aunt will take my computer out she said. hmmm so what u all think of this?? and the fish i got here 2 red devils at 1 1/2 inches for 3 buxss. and were in horrible tanks.. so whats ur oppinion on my situition? ( no comments bout the fish tho plz ) and if i do go to assisted living or independent living are small dogs allowed?

[petluvr]

First of all is your aunt your primary care taker and that is why your SSI is coming to her? SSI is meant to help take care of individuals who need it and YES living expenses such as rent, electric/gas and food are what the SSI payment is for. Your aunt should however give youa stipend or allowance out of that simply because having a few $$ in a persons pocket always helps them to feel better. You should not have lied to her about the fish, why did you lie anyway if they were only 3 bucks a piece she probably would have let you get them. Telling on your sis for something probably only made your aunt more mad. Suffer your punishment, learn from it and move on. Usually stuff isn't as bad as what it seems. As far as do you have a say in the independent living it would really depend upon your mental capacity that is deemed by the court.

[livebearerfreak]

true true.. but my aunt acts like shes my legel gaurdion ( or how ever u spell that ) and noone is my legel gaurdion.. theres no proof over that either.

[petluvr]

If your SSI check is coming to her then YES according to the social security administration she is your legal guardian. I still say suffer the punishment and learn from it. You do live in her house always remember that:) I know it is sometimes hard to take:)

[livebearerfreak]

If your SSI check is coming to her then YES according to the social security administration she is your legal guardian. I still say suffer the punishment and learn from it. You do live in her house always remember that:) I know it is sometimes hard to take:)
it isnt her house shes renting it as well as i am.
and sry if that came out harsh.

[The Zigman]

legal guardianship usually stops at 18, unless there are some extra circumstances... are you disabled or something?

why do you get SSI at 19 yrs old?

[livebearerfreak]

and i dont think she has the rights to ground a 19 year old either.

[petluvr]

Not harsh at all:) When I say "her house" I am assuming she is the primary bill payer within the household, of course this is just an assumption. R-E-S-P-E-C-T is what it boils down to you must respect her and her wishes even though sometimes you don't agree. I know it sucks but hey that's what being an adult is all about:)

[livebearerfreak]

cause of my eyes and slow learning prosseces or hwo ever u spell that.

[livebearerfreak]

Not harsh at all:) When I say "her house" I am assuming she is the primary bill payer within the household, of course this is just an assumption. R-E-S-P-E-C-T is what it boils down to you must respect her and her wishes even though sometimes you don't agree. I know it sucks but hey that's what being an adult is all about:)
yah... i just wish my mom was alive... she would now what to do lol. and theres no court papers over me about the gaurdionship thingy

[petluvr]

cause of my eyes and slow learning prosseces or hwo ever u spell that.
Very brave of you:thm:Maybe if you explained to her that the internet is not just a toy but it helps you learn better she would reconsider, also let her know that your fish are not just some "stupid fish" they are therapuetic and maybe that will help her understand why you like keeping them.

[petluvr]

When your SSI comes does it have both your name and your aunts or just yours on it?

[unvmyplecos]

i feel bad for ya man.... it seems to harsh a punsihment for the little minor stuff you did... its not like you stole like 50 bucks or somethin....... IMO SHE is the one who is bein harsh and SHE should really think things through... shes gonna punish you but not your sister who is getting her kid hooked on ciggaretes no offense to anyone but WHAT a moron

[livebearerfreak]

she lets my sister go on my computer and she also made an account to, which p*sses me off big time.. and if my aunt finds out im not in class and insstead on the computer she said shes gunna take the compter out and not let me use it.. hmmmm but im not gunna go to class today.. if i get in another fight tonite ill just go to a friends and stay there even tho im grounded lol. she also told me if i dont start listening shes gunna flush my fish down the toilet. HAH i wont let her or if she does she owes me money.. another thing is she lets my sister smoke in the house but wen i do/did i get yelled at and grounded for smoking in the house. im NINETEEN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

[livebearerfreak]

Very brave of you:thm:Maybe if you explained to her that the internet is not just a toy but it helps you learn better she would reconsider, also let her know that your fish are not just some "stupid fish" they are therapuetic and maybe that will help her understand why you like keeping them.
u wont like this but she has an oscar a femmale JD and a 12 to 14 inche plec all in a 29.. and doesnt change water for a month ( wen she does she uses this atoumatic gravel thingy ) and i have an oscar ( 3 inches ) a texas ( 2.5 inches ) 2 red devil hybrids with a midas ( 1 inch and 1.5 inche ) and have plans on upgradeing within 6 months.. and a 10 gallon for my breeding pair of convicts.

forgot to add her fish are:
oscar 10 inches
female JD 6 inches
plec 12 to 14 inches ( already mentioned )
and forgot to add a 1.5 inche texas i threw in there for the oscar to eat but i guess hes just hiding now.

[livebearerfreak]

When your SSI comes does it have both your name and your aunts or just yours on it?
it says: to the *something cant remember* of douglas harvey.

[petluvr]

PLEASE rethink not going to class and staying at your friends, making rash decisions while you are angry never helps anything. I know it may seem unfair and it is that she is punishing you and not your sister but sometimes adults aren't reasonable. We are not all perfect and she too makes mistakes. Learn from these experiences they will only make you stronger in the end I PROMISE:)

[petluvr]

it says: to the *something cant remember* of douglas harvey.
Probably caretaker or guardian of. Look at it like this she does love you no matter how weird of a way she has of showing it or she would not have let you come stay with her when your mother passed. Group homes are usually not good environments, if you REALLY feel as though she is taking advantage of you and your SSI you can always talk to your case worker about this and maybe she can put you and your aunt in touch with someone you can talk too.

[livebearerfreak]

Probably caretaker or guardian of. Look at it like this she does love you no matter how weird of a way she has of showing it or she would not have let you come stay with her when your mother passed. Group homes are usually not good environments, if you REALLY feel as though she is taking advantage of you and your SSI you can always talk to your case worker about this and maybe she can put you and your aunt in touch with someone you can talk too.
dont have a case worker or atleast not that I now of.

[livebearerfreak]

PLEASE rethink not going to class and staying at your friends, making rash decisions while you are angry never helps anything. I know it may seem unfair and it is that she is punishing you and not your sister but sometimes adults aren't reasonable. We are not all perfect and she too makes mistakes. Learn from these experiences they will only make you stronger in the end I PROMISE:)
o my sister and my cousins are grounded but not from the internet.

[johnlarson66]

so whats ur oppinion on my situition? ( no comments bout the fish tho plz ) and if i do go to assisted living or independent living are small dogs allowed?

I think your aunt is correct and if you do not want to live by the rules she makes then you should go somewhere else.

I think assisted or independent living would be your best option and you should get with your case worker asap. It will be up to the mangers involved with the housing if you are able to have a small dog. I have seen where a whole house has adopted the dog, it really depends on the situation.

You should not hesitate to contact your case worker or anyone else that is aware of your situation. Getting input from here is not the best place, we only know your side and only know what you tell us.

[livebearerfreak]

i dont now if i have a case worker.

[petluvr]

I am sure you do let me see if I can find a number for you to call to find out who your case worker is. You are in Wisconsin is that right?

[livebearerfreak]

eau clair WI

[livebearerfreak]

I am sure you do let me see if I can find a number for you to call to find out who your case worker is. You are in Wisconsin is that right?
go on chat im on there right now to and i can privete talk to u there

[johnlarson66]

Maybe someone at your class would know about your case worker...

Either way, I'll back away from all of this, seems likes petluvr is doing well.

[livebearerfreak]

udont have to. more advise the more help i get lol

[J double R]

:)

[livebearerfreak]

:)
ya?

[J double R]

ya?

well... i was just thinking of that one line from bambi... that thing that the little rabbit dude's mom told him... and i was applying it to myself. ;)

[livebearerfreak]

cant remember that line lol. refresh my memory plz.

[ciaobella7122]

anyone who gets SSI has a case worker. Actually if you go to the SSI office they should be able to tell you who it is. Assisted living is not a very nice place to be and I don't know how much you get from SSI but in the state of ct you would be able to apply for housing assistance which is like a cheap apartment. Some of them are actually pretty nice.
In the meantime it is her house and you will need your family at some point in the long run even if you do move so try to be nice and get along with them. Good luck

[ciaobella7122]

cant remember that line lol. refresh my memory plz.


"If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" -Thumpers mom..... yes my nieces disney movies have invaded my brain lol

[adwebster123]

Hi, i am a Mass attorney, and just looked up the age of majority in Wisconsin which is 18. Thus, unless you are under guardianship (and you would have to know, since you would have to have gone before a judge) you are of legal age and can decide where you want to live. No one can force you into a home - unless they are your legal guardian and even then you could contest it - I would suggest that you find a legal aid attorney (free if you dont have any money) or call the Wisconsin bar association for a referral, many attorneys will give you a free initial consult and many large firms have a pro bono (free) department.
good luck

[livebearerfreak]

she told me if i move its hers and grandma dissinion where i go. not mine. i up right and told her that im not going to assisted living/independent living. ( well she only mentioned the indeapendt living part not the assisted living ) i told her that i would move to my friends grandmas house and she told me ull see or try it or sumtin like that

[livebearerfreak]

"If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" -Thumpers mom..... yes my nieces disney movies have invaded my brain lol
ooo that one lol

[livebearerfreak]

Hi, i am a Mass attorney, and just looked up the age of majority in Wisconsin which is 18. Thus, unless you are under guardianship (and you would have to know, since you would have to have gone before a judge) you are of legal age and can decide where you want to live. No one can force you into a home - unless they are your legal guardian and even then you could contest it - I would suggest that you find a legal aid attorney (free if you dont have any money) or call the Wisconsin bar association for a referral, many attorneys will give you a free initial consult and many large firms have a pro bono (free) department.
good luck
nope i never went before a judge. and thanks

[petluvr]

I gave you the number to find out about your case worker in chat please please please start there.

[Eupterus]

I've read a few of your threads and you don't have it easy.
I do think you need to explain how keeping the fish is helping you cope with a tough situation ( I'm guessing here) and having internet access is a needed resource.

I don't know much about assisted living and if you wanted to go that direction, probably best bet is to find a site and email them for the details maybe?.
I'm guessing it's going to be at least semi restricted like any institution style living tends to be. Good luck.

[livebearerfreak]

o i forgot to mention im only able to use my cell for this kinda stuff and i have no money on my cell so i will call that number wen i get money on it. and THXS

[livebearerfreak]

I've read a few of your threads and you don't have it easy.
I do think you need to explain how keeping the fish is helping you cope with a tough situation ( I'm guessing here) and having internet access is a needed resource.

I don't know much about assisted living and if you wanted to go that direction, probably best bet is to find a site and email them for the details maybe?.
I'm guessing it's going to be at least semi restricted like any institution style living tends to be. Good luck.
thanks and ya i need my fish to help me cope with alot of stuff and i also need the internet for resources. i dont want to go to assisted living but my aunt said she and gma can make me.

[livebearerfreak]

im just worried that if my aunt finds out i ditched school she will yell at me more and take my computer ( hah i yell back at her but usaly does no good. its a 50-50 situation ) but ill fight for that. she said she would break my internet chip for my computer and not have to pay me 60 bux for it. ( i payed for that internet chip with MY OWN MONEY ) so ya life is a living hell

[livebearerfreak]

so wen i go back home tonite ima finish my DIY wet dry system for my tank.

[livebearerfreak]

well its not technecly a wt dry system its like an automatic water changer thingy i guess.

[livebearerfreak]

well il be back wednesday. gotta go.

[petluvr]

hope it all works out for you and please NO MORE DITCHING CLASS:)

[Bottomfeeder2]

heyy Livebearerfreak, you said you were rescuing the fish? If thats the case, try explaining that you care about animals and that even fish are living creatures and if you didnt buy them they would die.

[livebearerfreak]

i got kicked out so now im staying at a friends house for a few days to maybe a few months. she is really nice and spirital. anyways, my aunt threatened me that shes gunna smash my tank so i went and left ( this is al because she tried to get me to take my sleepting meds at SEVEN PM im like NO IM NOT and i told her im leaving well long story short im movin in with a friend for a few months and his mom is gunna help me make it on my own and stuff like that.. so if my tank aint smashed im bringing them over tommorrow and yupp God led me to a GREAT familey!! so any comments

[livebearerfreak]

my aunt said that shes takin me to the social services tommorrow and tell me what to do HAH rightttt no im not going. im just going to get my tank my cloths and my computer and tv and im outa there.

[Neervana]

wow you are really having a hard time, it must be so painful for you to try and cope with all of this and your mum not being here too. if you want to talk, pm me..but i dont live in your country so i would not be able to advise you. if your aunt is really taking you to the social services, then tell them everything that happened to you...but if she isnt and it's just a threat then you must sit down with her and try to make her understand you...if not that then the only thing i can tell you is try to get on with her until you're 21...surely then she cannot take you to the social services..that would definitely qualify you as an adult...things are hard for you...but you must endure it and carry on. its the only way...try to get on with your aunt, or even better just ignore her do not shout back at her, it will only give her reason to keep on punishing you and arguing.

[livebearerfreak]

well im moving in with my friend and his mom..

[livebearerfreak]

i go rid of my dog:( i miss her like hell WAHHHHH MISS U MINNIE

[livebearerfreak]

wow i cant believe how my past was........

[SubRosa]

I'm curious.How did you know your Oscar wanted feeders? Does he often tell you to do things? And do you often listen? It's name wouldn't be Sam would it?