I received this in an email and thought I would share it. Sounds like reasonable advice to me.
>HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION
>
>
>Q. I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
>
>A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...
>don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually.
>Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like
>saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.
>
>Want to live longer? Take a nap.
>
>
>Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
>
>A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and
>corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an
>efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain?
>Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green
>leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your
>recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
>
>
>Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
>
>A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled
>wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you
>get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of
>grain. Bottoms up!
>
>
>Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
>
>A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one
>to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
>
>
>Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise
>program?
>
>A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No
>Pain...Good
>
>
>Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
>
>A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable
>oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables
>be
>bad for you?
>
>
>Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around
>the middle?
>
>A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger.
>You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
>
>
>
>Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
>
>A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa beans ... another vegetable!!!
>It's the best feel-good food around!
>
>
>Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
>
>A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
>
>
>Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
>
>A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
>
>
>Hopefully, this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about
>food and diets and remember:
>
>Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
>safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in
>sideways - Champagne in one hand - chocolate mousse other - body
>thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming .......WOO HOO! What a
>Ride!"
>
>
>HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION
>
>
>Q. I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
>
>A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...
>don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually.
>Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like
>saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.
>
>Want to live longer? Take a nap.
>
>
>Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
>
>A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and
>corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an
>efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain?
>Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green
>leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your
>recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
>
>
>Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
>
>A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled
>wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you
>get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of
>grain. Bottoms up!
>
>
>Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
>
>A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one
>to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
>
>
>Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise
>program?
>
>A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No
>Pain...Good
>
>
>Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
>
>A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable
>oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables
>be
>bad for you?
>
>
>Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around
>the middle?
>
>A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger.
>You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
>
>
>
>Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
>
>A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa beans ... another vegetable!!!
>It's the best feel-good food around!
>
>
>Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
>
>A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
>
>
>Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
>
>A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
>
>
>Hopefully, this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about
>food and diets and remember:
>
>Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
>safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in
>sideways - Champagne in one hand - chocolate mousse other - body
>thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming .......WOO HOO! What a
>Ride!"
>
>
