Worst fiction contest 2010 winners

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Inka4040

O_o
Mar 31, 2008
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The Silver Slanket
For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity's affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss--a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity's mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world's thirstiest gerbil.

Molly Ringle
Seattle, WA

http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/
 

Rbishop

Administrator
Staff member
Dec 30, 2005
40,727
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Mr. Normal
And your point..?
 

Fishfriend1

Fishlover Extraordinaire
Dec 11, 2009
3,958
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Southeastern PA
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Mr. Palmer
wow, really? pathetic...
 

Inka4040

O_o
Mar 31, 2008
3,441
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The Silver Slanket
And your point..?
And yours?

Lol. Didn't realize GCC stood for grumpy curmudgeons complain. I found it funny, thought others might as well. Is there a problem with what I posted?
 
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Somervell

AC Members
Feb 8, 2009
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PA
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Anne
I thought it was kind of funny. Guess you have to be a writer to find it so.--LOL
 

Inka4040

O_o
Mar 31, 2008
3,441
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The Silver Slanket
was there a 2010 "nonfiction double-standard" winner, rick?
:lol: Unoffically, yes.

I'm particularly fond of these:

[FONT=&quot]Winner: Fantasy Fiction [/FONT]
The wood nymph fairies blissfully pranced in the morning light past the glistening dewdrops on the meadow thistles by the Old Mill, ignorant of the daily slaughter that occurred just behind its lichen-encrusted walls, twin 20-ton mill stones savagely ripping apart the husks of wheat seed, gleefully smearing the starchy entrails across their dour granite faces in unspeakable botanical horror and carnage – but that’s not our story; ours is about fairies!
Rick Cheeseman
Waconia, MN

[FONT=&quot]Runner-Up: [/FONT]
As Holmes, who had a nose for danger, quietly fingered the bloody knife and eyed the various body parts strewn along the dark, deserted highway, he placed his ear to the ground and, with his heart in his throat, silently mouthed to his companion, “Arm yourself, Watson, there is an evil hand afoot ahead.
Dennis Pearce
Lexington, KY

Leaning back comfortably in a plush old chair, feet up, fingers laced behind his head, Tom Chambers inventoried his life and with a satisfied grin mused, “Ah, marlin fishing off the coast of Majorca, a bronze star for that rescue mission in Jamir, the unmatched fragrance of pastries fresh out of the oven at Café Legrande, two sons who would make any father proud . . . I’ve never done any of that.”
Ernie Santilli
Drexel Hill PA
 

dougall

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Mar 29, 2005
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[FONT=&quot]The Zinfandel poured pinkly from the bottle, like a stream of urine seven hours after eating a bowl of borscht.


It just oozes awesome. :D
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
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H2Ogal

Betta Be Good to Me
Mar 16, 2010
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Memphis, TN
Real Name
Deborah
Hey, I know Molly Ringle! Old online friend of mine, great to see the news.

For those who don't know, the point is to produce truly dreadful prose, in the manner of Mr. Bulwer-Lytton, the Victorian writer who gave us, "It was a dark and stormy night" and loads more purple prose.

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Detective Winner

She walked into my office wearing a body that would make a man write bad checks, but in this paperless age you would first have to obtain her ABA Routing Transit Number and Account Number and then disable your own Overdraft Protection in order to do so.

Steve Lynch
San Marcos, CA
 

J double R

The Devil
Jan 13, 2007
6,071
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Louisiana
Real Name
Jon
And your point..?

Hey, I know Molly Ringle! Old online friend of mine, great to see the news.

For those who don't know, the point is to produce truly dreadful prose, in the manner of Mr. Bulwer-Lytton, the Victorian writer who gave us, "It was a dark and stormy night" and loads more purple prose.
San Marcos, CA

:silly:
 
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