Obituary of the Pillsbury Doughboy
Please join me in remembering a great icon. Veteran Pillsbury
spokesperson, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a severe yeast
infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry
Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Captain Crunch and many
others.
The graveside was piled high with flours as long-time friend, Aunt
Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who "never
knew how much he was kneaded."
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled
with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting
much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at
times, even as a crusty old man, he was still considered a roll model
for millions.
Toward the end it was thought he'd raise once again, but he was no
tart.
Doughboy is survived by his second wife, Play Dough. They have two
children and one in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20
minutes.
Please join me in remembering a great icon. Veteran Pillsbury
spokesperson, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a severe yeast
infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry
Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Captain Crunch and many
others.
The graveside was piled high with flours as long-time friend, Aunt
Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who "never
knew how much he was kneaded."
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled
with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting
much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at
times, even as a crusty old man, he was still considered a roll model
for millions.
Toward the end it was thought he'd raise once again, but he was no
tart.
Doughboy is survived by his second wife, Play Dough. They have two
children and one in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20
minutes.
