Actual Headlines from the news

[greeneyedlady]

THE YEAR'S BEST 2004

> Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
> [imagine that!]
>
>
> Something Went Wrong
> in Jet Crash, Expert Says
> [no, really?]
>
>
> Police Begin Campaign
> to Run Down Jaywalkers
> [now that's taking things a bit far!]
>
>
>
>
> Is There a Ring of Debris
> around Uranus?
> [not if I wipe thoroughly!]
>
>
> Panda Mating Fails;
> Veterinarian Takes Over
> [what a guy!]
>
>
>
>
> Miners Refuse
> to Work
> after Death
> [no-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!]
>
>
>
> Juvenile Court to
> Try Shooting Defendant
> [see if that works any better than a fair trial!]
>
>
> War Dims Hope
> for Peace
> [I can see where it might have that effect!]
>
>
> If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly,
> It May Last Awhile
> [you think?!]
>
>
> Cold Wave Linked
> to Temperatures
> [who would have thought!]
>
>
> Enfield (London) Couple
> Slain; Police
> Suspect Homicide
> [they may be on to something)

 

[OrionGirl]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly,
It May Last Awhile

I think I saw this one--about the stiking miners in Montana? Thought at the time that the witty writer should maybe look for another job...

 

[kveeti]

Those are great.

Have you ever listened to sports announcers? Countless times I've heard (in some form of the following) some bright commentator saying something like, "What they need to do to win is score more points than the other team."

 

[fishypoo2]

:laugh:

 

[ash]

sports announcers have the most bizzarre grammar. John Madden invents words- once on monday nigt football he cited soemone as being "within his zone of uncomfortability."

 

[125gJoe]

Good stuff...............