Years ago it was completely acceptable to keep goldfish in goldfish bowls, tiny turtles in turtle bowls. Today, we know much better and many countries have banned these practices because we NOW know it is cruel and considered animal abuse. 15 years ago not as much was known about keeping bettas in vases, tiny bowls..etc. Yes, it is still an unfortunate practice today but we also now know better. Once we take an animal/fish/reptile into our homes, it's our duty to provide them with the proper environment. You would never keep a kitten in a broom closet then feed it daily, change it's litter every Sunday and consider that an appropriate environment.
The thought "They are fine, they live in mud puddles in the wild" is a huge falsehood. It's an argument often heard but absolutely not correct. They do live in rice paddies but those do not equate mud puddles. They are at least knee deep and spread over acres. Plus nature takes care of oxygenating and filtering that water. We can not replicate that in 1 gallon or smaller vases and bowls.
I don't think people are trying to attack you but educate you. You could go to any fish forum and will get the same advice and information and probably not as gently. We have to adapt our fish keeping methods to the new information that becomes available.
As for one of your bettas living for 5 years that's wonderful. If every betta you had kept over the last 15 years lived to that age then you would have a better argument with the practices you use now. I have a friend with a betta in a 5 gallon, heated and filtered tank. That fish is now age 8+ years and still going strong.
I'm sorry you do not like the advice you have been given, but as I said above, you will get the same advice where ever you go...EXCEPT your local fish store. They want to sell fish, bowls, etc. It's good for their bottom line. It seems an easy way to keep a fish and they sell A LOT of the things needed only for the fish to suffer and die and the bowls to end up in the trash, rummage, etc.
