2tank, I forgot to address your concerns on pool filter sand & bottom dwellers. I've used it with several (10?) species of loaches & some catfish without issues, no barbel wear or body scratches. Only 1 actually buried itself entirely in the sand ( finer #1 pfs), most just poked their faces in for live worms etc.
I would be more concerned with sand sifters & PFS like some cichlids. But...if it's too big or rough they don't spew it out their gills, they just chew & spit IME. I don't know other than angels (not that I'd them call sifters), what cichlids or other sifters I've kept on PFS. Smallish gravel, yes, but then no gill action, just spitting.
#1 pfs does tend to "blow around" more than #2 or 20 grit depending on the filter return strength. & since it's lighter it's harder to swirl'n'vac over the surface or the quick vac plunge without losing more sand. You can always rinse any in the bucket & pour it back in the tank, there's a steeper learning curve with finer sands.
I only tried play sand once & hated it. It wasn't graded so there were fine & larger grains with compaction. Mine was also very dirty even after rinsing several times. The type 2 tank uses is more uniform & I'm sure much cleaner but at a huge cost difference, mine was ~$3/50 lbs.
I think I must have gotten Eco Complete (not sand) back in the sale days & free shipping of Drs. Foster & Smith (Live Aquaria now, owned by Petco) when 2tank got his Torpedo Beach sand, lol. I still have it & like it's small gravel size & almost black color. I tried Flourite black sand once but it was too fine & dusty for any but my 10g shrimp tank. My cherry shrimp did look great on it & plants grew very well. I was given some regular brown Flourite I tried once. It seemed more sharp than Eco, meh. I also have a newer tank with Black Diamond Blasting sand, no fish yet just plants & algae...I'll see how it works out...
I that may be my sum total of sand experience, sorry to ramble on...