And that is the key. Your friends will need you to put the stop of the tiger oscar in the 29 gal tank with a school of cardnials. And no, you should really re think the common placo in that 10 gal.
But the rest of it, work with the kid. This is double for a child with ASD. -Plan- the tank. Get a good color photo of the tank and have him help pick out the different elements that make it up. Fish, filter, rock, decorations...make a list of things you will need. Have his parents use it like a checklist when they take him to the store so they can visually show him the plan in progressing. Discuss before hand what you are going to go look for and have ideas and back up ideas.
Let me stress this thing again, because in my experience it is key for working kids with ASD and most of us "norms" have trouble getting how it can effect them. Lets say you are planning on getting black gravel with neon flakes in it. You and him and his folks have been talking about that is the best "plan" for the tank. But when you get to the store, they are out. 99.9% of the time, with kids with ASD, this is what leads you a melt down. They have a plan for how things are going to occur, and when it doesn't go that preplaned way, their minds just are not wired to cope with it. You and I can cope with disappointment, but this is a key skill that ASD kids have a difficult time learning, and as a result have a difficult time communicating their frustration. So it is good to have a plan and a backup plan. "I would like to have black with neon flakes, but if they are out and only have black, or red, or blue "that is okay, and the tank will still be really cool and the fish will like it."
So I would, with the family, develope a checklist that they can use to mark off the things they will need to purchase/obtain. You use your expertise to make sure they get the right size filter, correct ammount of rock, quality food, approprite conditioner, etc.
This can and should be a good skills development thing with him. It is going to help him with planning and patience and the enjoyment of a reward for a job well done in a tank he can enjoy. If you do all the work in the tank design, its going to have the same effect as if mom and dad got a new sofa.
So don't feel lost. Be there with the seeded filter media cause kids can't stand to wait for a tank to cycle! In fact, throw a fresh one in one of your tanks now so its good and ready to go! In all honesty, I am guessing and hoping, that when this build is done it is going to be one of the most memorable and rewarding builds you will have done in the hobby. It may look like a sororiety threw up in there, but the joy it brings will more than make up.
And again, I don't want to come off as a "know it all" on this subject. In fact, as a parent of ASD, you quickly learn that you know absolutely nothing. These are just approaches that I have used with some success in my situation and some of the methodologies I have witnessed some of my son's therapists in using.
But the rest of it, work with the kid. This is double for a child with ASD. -Plan- the tank. Get a good color photo of the tank and have him help pick out the different elements that make it up. Fish, filter, rock, decorations...make a list of things you will need. Have his parents use it like a checklist when they take him to the store so they can visually show him the plan in progressing. Discuss before hand what you are going to go look for and have ideas and back up ideas.
Let me stress this thing again, because in my experience it is key for working kids with ASD and most of us "norms" have trouble getting how it can effect them. Lets say you are planning on getting black gravel with neon flakes in it. You and him and his folks have been talking about that is the best "plan" for the tank. But when you get to the store, they are out. 99.9% of the time, with kids with ASD, this is what leads you a melt down. They have a plan for how things are going to occur, and when it doesn't go that preplaned way, their minds just are not wired to cope with it. You and I can cope with disappointment, but this is a key skill that ASD kids have a difficult time learning, and as a result have a difficult time communicating their frustration. So it is good to have a plan and a backup plan. "I would like to have black with neon flakes, but if they are out and only have black, or red, or blue "that is okay, and the tank will still be really cool and the fish will like it."
So I would, with the family, develope a checklist that they can use to mark off the things they will need to purchase/obtain. You use your expertise to make sure they get the right size filter, correct ammount of rock, quality food, approprite conditioner, etc.
This can and should be a good skills development thing with him. It is going to help him with planning and patience and the enjoyment of a reward for a job well done in a tank he can enjoy. If you do all the work in the tank design, its going to have the same effect as if mom and dad got a new sofa.
So don't feel lost. Be there with the seeded filter media cause kids can't stand to wait for a tank to cycle! In fact, throw a fresh one in one of your tanks now so its good and ready to go! In all honesty, I am guessing and hoping, that when this build is done it is going to be one of the most memorable and rewarding builds you will have done in the hobby. It may look like a sororiety threw up in there, but the joy it brings will more than make up.
And again, I don't want to come off as a "know it all" on this subject. In fact, as a parent of ASD, you quickly learn that you know absolutely nothing. These are just approaches that I have used with some success in my situation and some of the methodologies I have witnessed some of my son's therapists in using.