Aaahh, the Jack Handy classics....Tyler718 said:......... .....
Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
Jack Handy
Here's another...
"Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer."
aww, come on, one more....
"When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil."