Hollywood Squares
>>>Q. Do female frogs croak?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long
enough.
>
>>>
>>>Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high
should you be?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
>
>>>A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man
or a woman?
>
>>>A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Cosmopolitain, if you meet a stranger at a party and
you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if
he's married?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love
You"?
>
>>>A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
>
>>>A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next
apartment.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your
hands while talking?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and
I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going
to get any during the first year?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist
camps. One is politics, what is the other?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Can boys join the CampFire Girls?
>
>>>A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a
goose do?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting
into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is
it?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his
head, what was he trying to do?
>
>>>A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your
>elephant?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them
and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do
in bed?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
>>>Q. Do female frogs croak?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long
enough.
>
>>>
>>>Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high
should you be?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
>
>>>A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man
or a woman?
>
>>>A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Cosmopolitain, if you meet a stranger at a party and
you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if
he's married?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love
You"?
>
>>>A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
>
>>>A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next
apartment.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your
hands while talking?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and
I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going
to get any during the first year?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist
camps. One is politics, what is the other?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
>
>>>A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Can boys join the CampFire Girls?
>
>>>A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a
goose do?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting
into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is
it?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his
head, what was he trying to do?
>
>>>A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your
>elephant?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them
and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
>
>>>A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
>
>>>
>
>>>
>
>>>Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do
in bed?
>
>>>A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
