O-rings and lubricants
While I don't have much experience with what gasket lubricants (vaseline, silicone, veggie oil) to use in a fish tank, I deal with many different kinds of o-rings and "rubber" sealing materials at work. I'm a truck/construction equipment mechanic by trade, and I do a lot of hydraulic equipment work where I encounter many many many o-rings and rubber seals. O-rings are made of many different things, and each kind is meant to stand up to different things. All of them will wear out after a while.
Latex, like used in most condoms, is attacked by petroleum based lubricants. (vaseline, for example) Some other o-ring and sealing materials (silicone rubber, natural rubber, buna-N, nitrile, teflon.. ect.. the list goes on and on) are attacked by different things. I would go with what the manufacturer recomended for that reason. I know that *some* kinds of silicone based lubricants are used on water faucet o-rings, so at least some of em are safe (ish) for consumption, so I would assume that those same lubricants are ok for fish. I know that doesn't help much, but you might ask a plumber for recommendations there.