This is a heads-up to those friends who haven't experienced it yet,
> and
an
>explanation to those friends and family who have: Most of you have read
> the scare-mail about the person whose kidneys were stolen while he was
> passed out. Well, read on. While the kidney story was an urban legend,
> this one is not. It's happening every day.
>
>My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. It was
> just that quick. I went to sleep in my body and woke up with someone
> else's thighs. The new ones had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Who
> would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been mine for
> years? Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
>I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and
> angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans and Sheer
> Energy pantyhose.
>
>Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My butt
> was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match
> my new rear end (although badly attached at least three inches lower
> than my original) to the thighs they stuck me with earlier. Now, my
> rear
>complemented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic, I prayed that long skirts
> would stay in fashion.
>
>It was two years ago when I realized my arms had been switched. One
morning
>I was fixing my hair and I watched horrified but fascinated as the
> flesh
of
>my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This
> was really getting scary. My body was being replaced one section at a
> time. How clever and fiendish.
>
>Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age is supposed to creep up,
>unnoticed, something like maturity. NO, I was being attacked repeatedly
> and without warning.
>
>In despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could they do to me next?
>
>My poor neck disappeared more quickly than the Thanksgiving turkey it
> now resembled.
>
>That's why I decided to tell my story.
>I can't take on the medical profession by myself.
>Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee.
>That really isn't plastic that those surgeons are using. You KNOW where
> they are getting those replacement parts, don't you?
>The next time you suspect someone has had a face "lifted", look again.
> Was it lifted from you?
>I think I finally found my thighs .. and I hope that Cindy Crawford
> paid a really good price for them!
>
>This is not a hoax. This is happening to women in every town every
> night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS.
>
>P.S. I must say that last year I thought someone had stolen my breasts.
> I was lying in bed and they were gone! As I jumped out of bed I was
> relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I
> slept.
>
>Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
> and
an
>explanation to those friends and family who have: Most of you have read
> the scare-mail about the person whose kidneys were stolen while he was
> passed out. Well, read on. While the kidney story was an urban legend,
> this one is not. It's happening every day.
>
>My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. It was
> just that quick. I went to sleep in my body and woke up with someone
> else's thighs. The new ones had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Who
> would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been mine for
> years? Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
>I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and
> angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans and Sheer
> Energy pantyhose.
>
>Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My butt
> was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match
> my new rear end (although badly attached at least three inches lower
> than my original) to the thighs they stuck me with earlier. Now, my
> rear
>complemented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic, I prayed that long skirts
> would stay in fashion.
>
>It was two years ago when I realized my arms had been switched. One
morning
>I was fixing my hair and I watched horrified but fascinated as the
> flesh
of
>my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This
> was really getting scary. My body was being replaced one section at a
> time. How clever and fiendish.
>
>Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age is supposed to creep up,
>unnoticed, something like maturity. NO, I was being attacked repeatedly
> and without warning.
>
>In despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could they do to me next?
>
>My poor neck disappeared more quickly than the Thanksgiving turkey it
> now resembled.
>
>That's why I decided to tell my story.
>I can't take on the medical profession by myself.
>Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee.
>That really isn't plastic that those surgeons are using. You KNOW where
> they are getting those replacement parts, don't you?
>The next time you suspect someone has had a face "lifted", look again.
> Was it lifted from you?
>I think I finally found my thighs .. and I hope that Cindy Crawford
> paid a really good price for them!
>
>This is not a hoax. This is happening to women in every town every
> night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS.
>
>P.S. I must say that last year I thought someone had stolen my breasts.
> I was lying in bed and they were gone! As I jumped out of bed I was
> relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I
> slept.
>
>Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
