So, anyone got a good joke to share??

Soup Jokes!

What heck, soup could be funny!
It could happen!


We were eating in this open-air café when it started raining. It took us an hour and a half to finish our soup.

---

What's Martha Stewart's recipe for chicken soup? First, boil the chicken then dump the stock.

---

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.

---

"Hey waiter, you've got your thumb in my soup!" --"Don't worry, it isn't very hot."

---

"Waiter! Is there soup on the menu?" --"No, sir, I wiped it all off."

---

"Waiter, what's this frog doing in my soup!" --"Looks like he's eating the fly."

---

"Hey waiter, this soup tastes like dish water!" --"How do you know?"

---

How you make gold soup? With 22 carrots.

---

Is chicken soup good for your health? Not if you're the chicken.

---

:D


_______________


___________
 
Last edited:
Worst Joke Ever

1. Knock knock.
2. Who's there?
1. I hate you.
2. I hate you who?

1. Why? It's so smooth and chocolatey!

 
125gJoe said:
What heck, soup could be funny!
It could happen!
How you make gold soup? With 22 carrots.


:D



___________
Click to expand...

Don't get it :sad:
 
This man walks into a bar. Ask the bartender for a beer. After the beer is finished he asks for the bill.

- $2.50 says the bartender,

The man grabs a lot of pennies and dimes from his pocket, totalling 2.50 and throws them into the floor. Then leaves.

Next day the same man comes for a beer, is charged 2.50 and throws all the money in the floor again.

The third day, the bartender sees the man coming, serves him the beer and the man drinks it. After that, he takes a $5 bill and hands it to the bartender, who takes the change in small coins and scatters them into the floor.

The man says: "DOn't give me the change, I'll have another beer".
 
Mr. Parrot

This one actually made me laugh...

A woman went to a pet shop & immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot... There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00. "Why so little," she asked the pet store owner. The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of Prostitution and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff." The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird any way. She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam." The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's really not so bad." When her 2 teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw and said, "New house, new madam, new girls." The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation considering how and where the parrot had been raised. Moments later, the woman's husband, Keith, came home from work. The bird looked at him and said, "Hi, Keith!"
 
Blonde Jokes

The funniest Blonde Jokes:

I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......

* she called me to get my phone number.

* she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

*she tried to drown a fish.

*she thought a quarterback was a refund.

*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

*she tripped over a cordless phone.

*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

*she studied for a blood test.

*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home
 
Joe, I think this tops your worst ever!!!

graphicdesign_r said:
1. Knock knock.
2. Who's there?
1. I hate you.
2. I hate you who?

1. Why? It's so smooth and chocolatey!

Click to expand...


"Guess what?"

"What?"


















"Chicken butt!!!!!" :laugh:
 
patoloco said:
Don't get it :sad:
Click to expand...
The term "carat" is used to describe the purity of gold and is based on a total of 24 parts. Pure gold (100% gold and nothing else) is known as 24 carat. In 18 carat gold, for example, 18 of the 24 parts are gold and the remaining 6 parts are another metal, such as silver or copper.


..In soup, an ingredient might be carrots, and carrots are good for you... !



___________________
 
At 1am an old woman wakes up and finds that her husband is not in bed with her.

After laying for a while she decides to go look for him.

She finds him sitting at the dinning room table crying. She was amazed, never in the 50 years of their marriage has she seen him cry.

She walks up and asks him "Honey, what is wrong?"

The old man looks at her and says "Remember when you were 16 and I got you pregnant. And your mom said I would have to marry you or go to jail,"

"Yes," the old lady replied.

The old man looks her in the eye and says..."I would have gotten out today,"
 
graphicdesign_r said:
1. Knock knock.
2. Who's there?
1. I hate you.
2. I hate you who?

1. Why? It's so smooth and chocolatey!

----

Yes..
That was a good one!



________
Click to expand...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
AquariaCentral.com
Top Bottom