I almost puked a lot...
Going on to stage 3 of half doggy food and half beef with rice. I know he's trying to think of what he did so good to deserve such a good meal.
Bitsy, I don't know! It's not like I leave the stuff out either. He finds crap to eat! It's not all when I'm gone either. When he ate my phone he was next to the bed when I was asleep. He must have gotten bored when I was sleeping in, grabbed the phone off the shelf and started chewing. I was dreaming that he was eatting a bone. Then I brain clicked, "Wait... I never gave him a bone!" When I woke up he ate the intenna and the front face plate. He pooped the intenna a day later.
Another one I remember! We had a small glass snow globe with a dolphin in it. This was on a end table in the living room. We left so he grabed it, broke the glass, and ate the dolphin! He wasn't dumb enough to eat the glass thank god. I never did see the dolphin though.
He's an 80lbs dog and so dumb... but I love him.