Joke thread
- Thread starter Cheech
- Start date
What do a bucket and a duck have in common?
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They both have handles. Except for the duck.
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They both have handles. Except for the duck.
The Story of The Discontented Sparrow
Once upon a time there was a discontented sparrow. When all the other sparrows flew south for the winter, the discontented sparrow said, "Screw you guys, i'm staying here". But soon it grew too cold, and the sparrow had to start the long journey alone. Over a farmers field, the sparrows wings froze and he plummeted to the earth. A cow came over and crapped on the sparrow. The sparrow thought that this was the end, but the crap warmed up his wings and he was soon able to move again. The sparrow was so happy, he began to sing. A nearby cat heard the singing, cleared the crap off of the sparrow and ate him. This story has three morals. They are:
#1: everyone who craps on you isn't necessarily your enemy.
#2: everyone that gets you out of crap isn't necessarily your friend.
#3: if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.
Once upon a time there was a discontented sparrow. When all the other sparrows flew south for the winter, the discontented sparrow said, "Screw you guys, i'm staying here". But soon it grew too cold, and the sparrow had to start the long journey alone. Over a farmers field, the sparrows wings froze and he plummeted to the earth. A cow came over and crapped on the sparrow. The sparrow thought that this was the end, but the crap warmed up his wings and he was soon able to move again. The sparrow was so happy, he began to sing. A nearby cat heard the singing, cleared the crap off of the sparrow and ate him. This story has three morals. They are:
#1: everyone who craps on you isn't necessarily your enemy.
#2: everyone that gets you out of crap isn't necessarily your friend.
#3: if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.
I thought I'd bring this old thread back up 
There was these two perfect people they dated through there perfect highschool years got married had the perfect wedding, then had a perfect honeymoon got perfect jobs and later had two perfect kids. Well one day the perfect man and women were driving down the street and they saw santa claus. They didn't want there perfect kids to be sad because Christmas was almost there. But sadly they ended up in a car crash
Only one of them survived Can you tell me who?
The perfect women of course because the perfect man and santa claus don't exist!
There was these two perfect people they dated through there perfect highschool years got married had the perfect wedding, then had a perfect honeymoon got perfect jobs and later had two perfect kids. Well one day the perfect man and women were driving down the street and they saw santa claus. They didn't want there perfect kids to be sad because Christmas was almost there. But sadly they ended up in a car crash
Only one of them survived Can you tell me who?The perfect women of course because the perfect man and santa claus don't exist!
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okay there were 3 men up for execution and they were all going to be executed. The first one right before he was going to be executed he said Tornado! so everybody ran for shelter and he got away. the second person right before he was about to get executed he said Earthquake! and everybody ran for shelter and he got away. The third guy was about to get executed then he said FIRE!!!
hahaha
hahaha
