Groooooooooooan!!!

[benedictj]

Three Vampires walk into a noisy bar and sit down on the stools.
The first vampire orders a blood.
The second vampire orders a blood.
The third vampire orders a plasma.
The bartender, who had strained to hear them over the noise, shouts back at them, " let me make sure I've got this right, Two Bloods and a Blood Light"

 

[benedictj]

I heard a different version of that one just after the election!! :soda:

An international surgeons group is sitting in a bar after their annual convention, drinking. After a few hours, the specialists start to get drunk and begin bragging.

The Norwegian surgeons boast, "We took the liver out of a monkey and put it in a man, six weeks later he was out looking for work"

The German doctor retorts "We took the liver out a monkey, split it in two put it in two men and a month later they were both out looking for work"

The Japanese delegation added, "Oh, yeah. We took two kidneys out of a monkey, split both of them in two, placed them in four men and two weeks later they were all out looking for work"

Finally, one of the American doctors chimes in. "Well", he pauses. "We took a rectum out of Texas, put it in the White House and the next day half the country was out looking for work" :dance

 

[Cheech]

Q: What's green, has tires & grows?

A: Grass. I lied about the tires. :thud:

That was freaken hillarious man!!! lolol

 

[reiverix]

A penguin walks into a bar. Goes up the the barman and asks "Have you seen my brother". The barman replies "No, what does he look like?"

 

[Matak]

A penguin walks into a bar. Goes up the the barman and asks "Have you seen my brother". The barman replies "No, what does he look like?"

Groan!

 

[Cheech]

Two guys walk into a bar.
The third guy ducks.

That is one of my favorite jokes of all time.

I heard it differently... A Jew walks into a bar, *ouch*

 

[Bobafish]

A dislexic man walks into a bra! That one had me LMAO for a while

 

[Matak]

I heard it differently... A Jew walks into a bar, *ouch*

I just don't get it, am I missing something?

 

[Cheech]

I just don't get it, am I missing something?

lol... Yeah, I didn't either, first time I heard it. Not a bar bar, just a plain old bar. . . Walks into a bar? Like an iron bar? ? ?

 

[Matak]

lol... Yeah, I didn't either, first time I heard it. Not a bar bar, just a plain old bar. . . Walks into a bar? Like an iron bar? ? ?

I thought that because it was a Jew that walked into the bar, maybe it had something to do with a bar mitzvah or something?